Spending time together with new friends is always fun, but
if you are invited to somebody’s home for a meal, or just for an evening of
mixing with people, it can be confusing to know what the correct etiquette is and
whether anything is expected of you!
When you are with friends, things can be quite informal and
so often asking whether you need to bring anything with you or how you should
dress is not a problem. However, if you will be visiting people you are not good
friends with (such as friends of friends, colleagues or perhaps even the
parents of the person you are dating), knowing the basics of how the British
act in these circumstances can help you overcome any worries or concerns that
you might have.
If you are invited to somebody’s home or event, let them
know if you will be coming! It is important to let them know if you plan to
attend, but also if you do not plan to attend. If the person is hosting a
dinner or party, they will need to know how many are coming to prepare
food/snacks and drinks (or even checking that they have enough chairs!). If you
have any special dietary requirements, such as being a vegetarian or having food
allergies, let the host know in advance.
If you will be visiting somebody else’s home, you should be
punctual! Make sure you know what time you are meant to arrive, especially if
the host is cooking as they will want to make sure the food is ready for when
you arrive or soon afterwards. Sometimes the invitation may be for between “7 and
7:30” in which case you should definitely be there before 7:30.
When you arrive, greet the host. In most cases, a handshake
will be the most appropriate thing to do. If you are with close friends
however, hugging would be OK.
It is not always necessary, but traditionally guests may
bring a gift for the host such as flowers or chocolates. Guests will also
usually bring something to drink, a bottle of wine, beers or soft drinks,
whatever is most appropriate for the situation. It is always important to ask
whether you should bring anything, and in most cases the host will let you
know.
When it comes to sitting down to eat, it should be obvious
how the food will be served. Food will either be put on to the plate and given
to you directly, set out on the table for you to help yourself and pass around,
or set out separately for you to join a queue and select what you would like
(buffet-style tends to be a bigger events and parties). Once everyone has their
food, you can eat! Tradition in the UK is to wait until everyone has their food
in front of them so that everyone begins eating at the same time. Only eat
before everyone has their food if the people without food (or the host) says
that it’s OK to do so!
When it comes time to eat, using a knife and fork is the way
to go. It is considered bad manners to use just the fork or your hands unless
you’re eating pizza, burgers or at a barbecue. Never lick the knife either, or
put it in your mouth; always use the fork to eat and the knife to cut!
Generally, the fork is in your left hand and the knife goes in your right (or
the other way around if you are left-handed). When it comes to dessert, you may
be offered a fork or a spoon, or both. Either is fine to use.
At the end of the night, remember to thank your host and say
goodbye to them.
You might wish to offer them an invitation to visit you and
host your own dinner or event. If not, you can always sent them a note, email
or text message at a later time to thank them again for a lovely evening;
politeness is always appreciated!
Let us know your experiences of attending an event or dinner, or if you have hosted your own!
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